Online · One-to-one · Anywhere in the UK

Relationship Counselling Online — One-to-One, Starting with You

I'm Brian Sheppard, a clinical psychotherapist and mental health specialist, UKCP registered, with over 25 years in mental health. I work with people on their own about the relationships that matter most to them: a partner, an ex, a parent, a friend, a family that never quite lets you be yourself. You come alone. That's not a limitation of how I work; it's the point of it.

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UKCP registered
50-minute sessions on Zoom
£80 a session

Does this sound familiar?

Who this is for

People who keep having the same argument, or the same silence, and are ready to look at their own side of it. You might recognise some of this:

The same row with the same person, on a loop you could both recite
You've stopped saying what you actually think, because it isn't worth the fallout
You seem to pick the same kind of partner every time, and you're tired of finding out why the hard way
Trust has been broken, by them or by you, and you can't tell whether to stay or go
A parent or a sibling who can still undo you in one phone call
Friendships that quietly thinned out, and you're not sure whether it was them or you
You're the one who always gives way, and it's starting to cost you
You love someone, and you don't much like who you are around them

You don't need your partner to agree there's a problem before you come. You only need to want to understand your part in it.

Let's talk it through

My approach

How I work with relationships

I see people one-to-one. I don't run joint sessions, and I won't take sides in a relationship I only ever hear one half of. What I offer instead is something you can't get in the middle of a row: an hour where the only person you have to be honest with is yourself, and someone beside you who's listening for the pattern rather than the verdict.

I'm a person-centred psychotherapist, which in plain English means the session follows you. You talk about what happened on Tuesday. I ask about the last time it felt like that. Slowly the shape of the thing comes into view: what you reach for when you feel unheard, what you learned about love long before you were old enough to choose, what you're protecting when you go quiet or go on the attack. Communication, trust and conflict are the words people arrive with. Underneath them there's usually one person doing what they've always done, and not yet seeing it.

Some people come to me to hold a relationship together. Some come to leave one well. Many come not knowing which, and that's fine; you don't have to decide anything to start. I won't tell you what to do about your marriage. I will help you hear what you already think about it.

Everything is online, over Zoom, for 50 minutes a week. For relationship work that matters more than you'd expect: you're not in a waiting room with your partner's car outside. You're wherever you can speak freely.

Questions I'm often asked

Can I have relationship counselling on my own?

Yes, and with me it's the only way. If what you want is sessions with both of you in the room, I'm not the right person, and I'll happily point you towards someone who does that well. But don't assume that's what you need. Most of the work in any relationship is done by one person at a time, in the moment before they react. When you change how you respond, the conversation changes, and that's within your reach without anyone else's permission, agreement or attendance.

What if I'm the problem?

Then you're already further along than most people who walk into this. Nobody is the whole problem in a relationship, and the fact that you can ask the question means you're capable of looking. That's all I need from you. We'll look at what you do when things get tense, why it made sense once, and what it costs you now. No shame, no lecture, no verdict. Understanding a pattern is very different from being told off for it.

Do you work with affairs and broken trust?

I do, whichever side of it you're on. Infidelity is one of the hardest things to talk about honestly, because everyone around you has already decided what it means. If you were betrayed, you may be swinging between wanting them and wanting them gone, and being told to do one or the other by people who've never been there. If you were the one who strayed, you may have nowhere at all to take the guilt, the confusion or the part of you that doesn't regret it. I've sat with both, and I don't keep a moral scoreboard. I'm interested in what it's telling you about what you need.

How do I know whether to stay or leave?

You won't find the answer on this page, and I won't hand it to you in the third session either. What I can do is make the decision genuinely yours, rather than one you're being pushed into by fear, guilt, the kids, the mortgage or your mother. That means getting clear about what you actually want, separating it from what you think you should want, and looking honestly at what's changeable and what isn't. People who've done that tend to be able to live with whatever they decide. If it's ending, my divorce counselling page picks up where this one leaves off.

Is this only for romantic relationships?

No. Some of the most important relationship work I do is about a parent, a brother, a grown-up child or a friendship that's gone wrong. The same patterns run through all of them; the person you become in a row with your father is usually related to the person you become in a row with your partner. If a relationship is taking up more of your head than it should, whatever it is, it's fair game.

Fees and first step

What it costs and how to start

Sessions are 50 minutes over Zoom and cost £80. I keep a small number of reduced-fee places for people on a low income; ask me on the introductory call. How everything works, including cancellations, is on my fees and concessions page.

Before anything else, we have a free introductory call. You tell me a bit about what's going on, I tell you how I work, and we both get a feel for whether it's a fit. No pressure, no obligation. If it isn't right, I'll say so and point you somewhere better.

£80 per session

50 minutes, one-to-one on Zoom
Free introductory call first
Some reduced-fee places